Discussing with a person of interest can sometimes be against one's will. The majority of men are found doing frequent mistakes that result in a less than average interaction with women. The post that follows is meant to inform the readers on surviving such faults of conversing with women and instead, using the best strategies that will make their lives better. We will use Craig Ferguson's conversational skills as a template for the task at hand.
Stop Thinking of Conversation as an Exchange of Information
A mistake that men frequently make is seeing communication only as a medium to transfer data. In place of concentrating on information sharing, stress on creating a memorable experience full of emotional knots. The fundamental change is in the way you perceive the situation not just as a question-answer session but as a joyous interaction.
You know, just like when you are asked a very easy question, for instance, where do you come from? In place of just giving the answer, which is like boring and factual, why not try to add a pinch of humor. Just like, for instance, Craig Ferguson employs to answer playfully and to own various situations add fun in a conversation. For example, if someone asks, ""What do you do?" you could say something funny before you give them your real job. This way not only it will be remembered but it can also create a funny atmosphere and help people to feel connected to you.
Inject Humor into Small Talk
It is must be to maintain a light and enjoyable environment during the small talks, especially at the beginning of the conversations. Neutrality is the most common tendency of men towards small talk which, however, can sometimes make a conversation tedious. Nevertheless, you should set your target as being playful and humorous in at least 25% of your small talk responses. An example is if a lady asks you about your job instead of saying, “I am a lawyer” you could joke, “I am a paralegal which is just like being a lawyer, except for I jump out of airplanes!”
When you respond in a playful manner, you not only distinguish yourself but also foster a laid-back ambience for the two of you to share jokes and relish the conversation. This banter can change the boring small talk to a fun and flirty exchange.
Avoid Overly Enthusiastic Responses
A classic blunder is the tendency to reply to everything a woman says with a show of too much enthusiasm. Though it is essential to show interest, being overly excited can give an impression of being insincere or even needy. The interactions of Craig Ferguson are a point to take note of; he combines positivity and playful teasing, thus being engaging without being overly eager.
In a situation where she talks about mechanical engineering, instead of saying, "That's amazing!" you can playfully respond with, "So you're basically building robots to take over the world? How exciting!" This style makes the conversation more dynamic and avoids making it predictable.
Master the Art of Push-Pull
"Push-pull" is a complimentary and teasing method that is practiced by talking very quickly in between the two and holding a conversation. With this technique, the communication stays active and does not lose its appeal. A practical application of this would be, for instance, you telling, "I really adore your dress; it is quite different … but do you really dress like a tablecloth normally?" This combination of adulation and light-hearted derision builds a friendly environment for both to be comfortable and have a good time in the conversation.
Avoiding the impression of being too insincere or overly flattering is a must; hence balancing compliments with teasing is important. The target is the introduction of a kind of playful tension that makes dialogue fascinating and unforgettable.
Creating a Safe Space for Flirtation
Beside learning how to attract women through conversation, the other main lesson is the creation of the space where they can be flirty and sexual with free will. Craig Ferguson is a brilliant person to learn from, he avoids being creepy or making people uncomfortable when he introduces sexual topics into conversations. His confidence enables him to deal with these subjects in a fun and carefree manner.
When it comes to talking about relationships and sex, he doesn't feel uptight about it at all. The warm, relaxed atmosphere he creates and the comforting signal of body language of his make it clear that the given topics can be safely explored. The level of the other person's comfort should be the index for you: If they are comfortable, you proceed; if not, you switch to different topics. If she is comfortable, you can keep the conversation going; if she isn’t, you can ask about something more interesting.
Use Playful Misinterpretation
Flirting can be sought in the way of teasing through playful misunderstanding. Therefore, it is a good method to employ that helps you to gently make fun of her while at the same time establishing some level of interest in moving the conversation to a more intimate one. The way you could do this is related to her discussion about a very beautiful place she visited. You could in a joking way say that what she described sounds like a romantic getaway from her.To this, she could either laugh or if she wants, discuss more about that.
Craig frequently uses this strategy to make the chat more fun and flirty by distorting or misinterpreting what others said. This tactic enhances the connection and gives her the possibility to answer in a way that provides continuity to the conversation.
Calibrate to the Situation
While bringing up sexual topics, it is important to tune your strategy according to the environment and the woman's signals. Suppose the dialogue has been amusing and cheerful, you could be allowed to suggest flirtation more now. In contrast, if the atmosphere is heavy or she appears felt uneasy that way, then it's appropriate to completely avoid suggestions of sex.
Watch out for her physical activities and spoken signals. Her leaning towards you or enjoying the punchlines is a clear indication of her being at ease and showing respect. In contrast, if she steps back or diversifies the topic, interpret it as a signal to modify your method.
Practice Makes Perfect
To enhance your conversation skills, persistence and commitment are crucial factors. As you familiarize yourself with the humor and tease the women, you will naturally get the hang of it. The first thing you'd want to practice is with your friends, or environments that have lower risks of embarrassment, and that will act as a stepping stone before you approach someone you are attracted to. In this way, you will revise your methods, and eventually learn to work with them.
It is essential to keep in your mind that the main aim is to have fun and experience the pleasure of getting to know someone. By concentrating on the playful and interesting environment in which you are, you will, without effort, be a more desired person for your romantic interest.
Final Thoughts
Conquering the topic of conversation to the opposite sex doesn't need to be a difficult task. The main formula to achieve this will be to change your view regarding the dialogue, adding humor to it, maintaining a fine balance between positivity and playful teasing, and finally, setting a safe environment for a flirtation to happen. Such a tremendous improvement to your prospect of making a real emotional connection will be possible. Remember that your learning is the most important and, of course, with the necessary disposition, you can eventually be the person you want to be.
The points you need to consider when you start chatting with someone you are attracted to are the ones mentioned above, and you should just let your confidence do the talking!